Clown Virus
17 February 1975
The Goodies first had cause to tangle with the US military in Series 1’s “The Greenies”. Four years later, they’re at it again in “Clown Virus”. Some of the more successful incidental and comedic elements of that first outing are repeated:
- Tim and Graeme’s disregard for Bill (in “The Greenies” having him chase behind the trandem; in “Clown Virus” watching with removed disapproval as he flirts with danger at the checkpoint entry)
- test rabbits and secret plans (Tim: “You look over there, you look in there, and I’ll start here, okay? Well get looking, ‘cause we haven’t got much time. Found it.”)
- American missiles directed to inflict friendly fire
- a satirical abundance of signs (H-BOMB: IN CASE OF EMERGENCY, BREAK GLASS, PRESS BUTTON)
It is evident from the outset, however, that the Super Chaps have become more assured in their approach. Firstly, there is the sheer speed with which they cut to the episode’s premise. We’re given no prelude at the office, no guest star imploring them for their help. Instead, the lads cruise up to the army base on their trandem and sneak in. It’s only from their facial expressions as the hippie protestor is blown up, and from the quirky, out-for-a-jaunt instrumental piece and the fact the warning notice UNITED STATES MILITARY BASE—KEEP OUT has been plastered over a Norfolk Fenland National Park sign, that we can intuit they’ve stumbled upon, rather than set out to investigate, the Yanks at large… none of which makes sense once it transpires that Major Cheeseburger has sent for them!
Once the Goodies enter Cheeseburger’s office, they deliver a scathing, satirical indictment of all things American and military: from overly literal manifestations of ‘laughing’ and ‘tear’ gas (plus ‘clap’, the cannisters in question containing not gonorrhoea but rather an aerosol-delivered compunction to applaud; Bill: “There’s a very big order here… from David Frost.”), to Watergate allusions and the open secret that everything they say is being recorded—in one instance on the reel-to-reel doctored chest of Jane Fonda![1]—and later a souvenir ‘To Hitler with love’ bomb and a mandated purple heart triggered/awarded with callous gravitas by Peter Dyneley (the voice of Thunderbirds, no less) from within a five-sided viewscreen (“We here in the Pentagon…”). Guest star John Bluthal—an accomplished actor, well known from the sitcom Never Mind the Quality, Feel the Width (1967-1971)—pitches his Cheeseburger performance at just the right level of over-the-top-Americanness.
Having taken on the task of disposing of the Americans’ alleged tomato soup, the lads give us first the usual physical comedy hijinks (to the soul-funk groove classic ‘Boomerang Love’):
…then the trademark wit and wordplay as they come to terms with the liquid nerve gas (that they’re eating!):
![Picture: Tim sips from a soup ladle. Graeme and Bill look up, pained, from their bowls of soup (now coloured red by paint).
Dialogue from the episode:
Bill: You realise we are just about to take a mouthful of what is probably liquefied nerve gas.
Tim: It is tomato soup.
Graeme: It’s bright green!
Tim: So, the tomatoes weren’t ripe... Drink it up; it’s the only way we’re going to get rid of it.
Bill: Oh, come on. It can’t be tomato soup if it’s green.
Graeme: Perhaps it’s pea.
Bill: [Pause to reflect on the homophone] It’s certainly not soup.](https://www.jacobedwards.id.au/wp-content/uploads/2025/02/38-Bright-Green.png)
Again, newfound in Series 5, there’s a smooth if utterly bonkers progression from starting premise to reduction ad absurdum. On the back of what seems an almost throwaway jab at the Trust House Forte motorway service stations:
…the Goodies turn themselves and then the entire population of Britain into clowns! (Tim’s transformation is particularly well rendered, bookended by Graeme’s inspired double-takes.) Nothing now stands in the way of an all-out invasion by the United States…
“Clown Virus” is without doubt another classic, albeit the ending (as was so often the case with The Goodies) is comparatively weak, featuring the Super Chaps clowning about in beachfront battle against a lacklustre nonet of American soldiers. The usual caveat applies, however, that this anticlimax results from the lads having upped and upped the comedy until they painted themselves into a corner. Rare indeed were the episodes that could continue that skyward trajectory all the way through to the closing credits.
The Invasion of Britain scenes may lack punch, but are lifted up by a rousing, rollicking Bill Oddie musical number—‘Here Come the Clowns’—which incorporates a spiralling circus motif into its rock progression, and shows a markèd deftness of lyrical touch. While ostensibly about circus clowns (“Bring up the curtain, bang on the drum”), there’s a clear invitation to contemplate the tragicomic American military machine in Vietnam (“Ain’t it amazing? Ain’t it a shame? They been goin’ about sixteen years and every night the same”), as well as a neat, quasi-ironic bit of self-referencing (“Here they go now, same old show now, getting’ up and fallin’ down”). One might even be tempted to read into Bill’s tortured vocals a skerrick of lament that his recent chart success as a musician (1974’s top-40 single “The Inbetweenies”) inevitably cast him as a novelty performer. Thus, he plaintively asks:
“Who the hell would be a clown?”
Well, indeed!
Jacob Edwards, 17 February 2025
Tweets:
[1] From Walk on the Wild Side, 1962.
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